Posted by: cmittermeier | February 26, 2012

Progress, Plateaus, and Peace

Tomorrow morning I will be getting on my scale.  I am not looking forward to this one.  Today as I reflected on the week, a part of me kept trying to tell me the week really wasn’t that bad.  Though I pushed the thoughts out a lot, I kept coming back to how a “bad week” used to look.

Go back 10 years, a binger week would have included an entire box of oreos, an entire 2 litre box of chapmans ice cream and a tonne of diet coke.  If I was willing to put up with the lactose issues, I’d go for whipped cream.  Lots of it. That would be in one sitting, and they were often many days at once.

Go back 5 years, a binger week would include a lot of freshly baked bread, banana spelt muffins.  Not just one, or two, but likely 20 or more.   Any cake would have been fair game, and not just a few pieces.  ditto for pie, though I’d managed to learn how to control ice cream, ha ha. Again, bad days usually didn’t come solo.

Go back to last week.  Thursday night I ate a piece of cake.  Friday afternoon I ate half a bag of cheddar popcorn instead of dinner and then went out that night and ate some very delicious cheese, a daiquiri and a piece of cheesecake.    Saturday was my husband’s birthday, I had potatoes wedges and 4 mini cupcakes.  Sunday morning I ate 2 more mini cupcakes.  I ate 2 coconut cookies and then at the end of the day I ate 4 homemade chocolate chip cookies.

It is a rather different level of binging.  I guess there was a point to that little voice.  Yup, as the week went on, my indulgences got worse.  I’ve also had a hard time saying my prayers, keeping up with my devotions.  This is the first weekend of Lent, and this is what I have to show for it?  Indulgence?  I guess that little voice has some competition.

I haven’t had much success coming up with a Lenten promise.  All my reflections keep focusing back to my book, getting it published – but I think part of me was sort of hoping it would be part of my health journey.  I’d just gotten back to my pre-christmas weight.  Now, I am back there at the beginning of a season of penance and fasting.  It made sense, and now I’m disappointed.

I guess, in the end, this means I need to keep doing what I’m doing instead of making a further change.  It also means I need to take much more seriously the work on my book.


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